Thursday, December 27, 2007

The Worst Christmas, ever!

Being on choir's duty for the lastest mass, in the evening of Dec 25,
missed all of romantic feeling of christmas carol,
being yelled by the Priest just because the present congregation gave an applause for our performance,
said it had ruined the sacred moment of praying,
said it isn't our church tradition
said that everything done in a mass should be only for God's Glory, none else
But how could someone appreciate what God has done without see it happened to something real?
How could something good happened without God's blessing?
And more basically...........
What's wrong in giving an appreciation, or a thank-you for an obvious hardwork done for our own benefit?
Worse, the priest wasn't even our own parish priest!

Hope this won't damp the spirit of the newcomers in this youth choir!

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Don't lie, please!

So many years making friends through internet, I still couldn't understand why people have to lie about himself. Why pretend single if you're already married. Why flirt when you're not free to continue it through.

It is not fair. Not for your spouse. Neither for your new friend. It is one step to start an affair, a preliminary act to break an already established relationship, a first step to hurt other's feeling.

Listen to your heart

Generally, I am one of the person who rarely act spontaneously, need quite much time in taking decisions especially if it would affect my entire future. When I am faced to more than one options, I sort of let the flow taking me as far as it could until the critical time when I really have to choose my next direction. This way, I could give myself the sufficient time, more or less, to listen what my heart wish me to do for the best.

Every religion surely would say that God never leaves his people alone. He would always be gladly to show us the way. It is us, His people, who always fails to recognize what He says, because we rarely provide even a little time to keep silent, calm down, give Him a chance to talk and give us what we need to know.

People says that God speaks through your heart. The trouble is to recognize that it's really, really your heart speaking, not your emotions nor your desires. Sometimes I called the voice of God as instings or feelings, the other times I recognized it flowing through my logical mind. Either way, I always try to listen and follow it. But, there were also times that I just did something spontaneously, ignoring the alarm bells of my feelings and finally ended with disaster, more or less. Oh, well, I am only human after all.

Sunday, November 25, 2007

A Conversion from Oil to Gas : Between Government's Assumption and Public's Ability to Pay

These days in every Indonesia's TV stations, there is an ad to promote a recent programme of our government : Converse in using oil to gas for cooking. This programme is intended to help the Government in reducing the heavily subsidized fuel and electrical consumption.

The bottom line of the ad is that if we really count it, the average daily cost of using gas is definitely lower than using oil, not to mention others advantages like easier in cleaning, less time consuming in cooking process, lower risks in igniting fire and explosion.

Well, it's true. But one thing crucial which I guess never thought by our government is the people's ability to pay. Maybe gas is less costly than oil, but one couldn't buy gas in only 2-5 litres a day. One has to buy a container minimum for 15 kg, that assumed could be used for one or two weeks. And for that, one has to pay Rp 30.000,00. Compare that with oil which could be bought only for a litre or Rp 2.000,00. It could be only for a day, yes, but then mostly lower and middle class people now live on daily basis. That means all they have is just for living today only. So, they would buy things they need for today. There's no money that big so they could buy gas, and surely there isn't any agent who would willingly sell the 15 kg gas at once and be paid daily afterwards.

Maybe there are many people in this country that couldn't imagine or simply don't know that there are others who still try hard to live and exist from day to day, even in big metropolis cities like Jakarta and Surabaya. But, they do exist, and they're the most to suffer from this conversion programme as this programme mostly is aimed for people living in the big and metropolis cities.

Well, I guess it's hard. The government and those people, they both are all right in their each opinions. But, really, all that we need is time to cool down. So, the government has to be more patient in socializing the programme. And we, the people, should try to trust the goodwill of our government and give a chance in trying and running the programme, see if it is really as good as the government says it will.

Talk less, do more!

Monday, November 12, 2007

A Surprise Development from a Friend's Success Story

Some times ago, I wrote about my online friend who said that he would be getting married soon.

Well, I sent him a congratulation note soon after publishing my writing. The next day, I found a reply from him telling me that actually he didn't have any plan to get married. He used the reason just for closing his profile! lol....why should he do that, anyway? Isn't it more simple just to withdraw from the website?

Well, I don't know his real reason because i missed his call through my home, and he haven't call me again ever since and indeed his site aren't active at all.

The National Examination: Fair or Not?

Last Friday, there was a talk that students from several high school at Surabaya would demonstrate against the new addition subjects to the National Examination which will be held on June 2008. I am not sure if those students truly did their action, since I haven't read any weekend newspapers, yet.

For the last few years, there were only 3 subjects included in the National Examination (UNAS); Maths, English, and Indonesian. Students have to gain minimum grade 5 of 10 to be passed from those exams. Further more, there must not be any grade under 5 in each subject. So, although one student gain a perfect 10 on Math, he/she wouldn't pass if, for example, the grade of his/her indonesian test is only 4.75.

I am not sure what the new subjects will be added to the next year UNAS. Anyway, I think it is necessary. Just think, a junior high school student also has three years to learn Physics and Biology, just like the three subjects above. So, why those two subjects shouldn't be included in the National Examination as well? The same reason goes as well for other subjects for senior high school students, like chemistry, economy and accountancy.

When I was still on high school, more than 10 years ago, the sum of the National Examination subjects was almost the same as the school examination. I think it was 5 subjects for junior high school and 7 for the senior years. Easier in my days? Of course not..........., I don't think so! The skill level required is almost the same between now and then. The materials are also almost the same. So, what's the big, heavy issues here?

I guess one main thing that make the students now recoil in thinking must studying more subjects for the UNAS is the grade system. In my days, there was also a rule that a minimum grade must be gained was 6, higher that nowadays rule. But it was an average grade, not individual. So, it was okay if one only got 4 in a subject, as long as he/she got much better grade in others. Further more, this UNAS grade was not the only factor in determining either a student passed his/her exam or fail. The major factor was still held by local exams done by each school.

I think the UNAS system now indeed unfair both to the students and schools. Three years learning only to be decided by one day exam only? In doing so, the government also undermine the school roles, as though they didn't believe in the teachers' works at all. Granted, the UNAS is still very important, but I think not for deciding the student passing grades, but more for help a student decide where he/she will go after this kind of school. Either he could continue to university or polytechnic or taking others short courses. So, the UNAS system will be more like SAT in USA or "A" and "O" level in Singapore. Let the school decide on its own either a student has fullfill his required skills or not.

But, in the hard, children! It's your obligation, doesn't matter if you should do three exams or seven. Give your best, and don't worry..after all, everything good will be ended well.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Xtra-L Community

Today, I read an interesting material in the Kompas, one of the biggest Indonesian newspaper. It's about a community consisted of persons with big body or commonly called as XL, who try together to change the general opinion about beautiful and body size.

I thought to join them. I actually had taken the first step to sign up. But, then I came up with this part which required me to tell them a little about myself and why I want to join them. The first question is easy. I surely am one of big size people, what with my 157cm height and 80kg weight. The second question made me think again about my motivation.

Granted, I am a little curious about this community. I guess I want to meet some people who also try to think less about their body, who has quite confidence in presenting herself/himself as big as she/he is, no matter what world says about them. But, do I really want to join them? Exactly what I need from this community? I still don't find the right answer. Will a curiosity is enough for join this community? Not for me! So, I decided not to sign up for now. Maybe later, after I re-read the material again.....hehehe....

But, anyone who interested to join them but haven't read the article, visit them on

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Have it your way!

When someone wants to be friends with me, I'd like to know some basic information about this person. Maybe I won't ask them outright at once, but nevertheless I'd try to read it between lines.

When I choose to be friends with someone, I'd like to say hi once a while. Exchanging news. Maybe deliver a birthday card if I know his/her birthday or other seasonal cards.

But if this person who had asked to be added in my contact list and finally I'd accepted it....if this person seem wouldn't respond to my attempts to make a friendly contact......then why should I bother about the whole thing anymore? I should just say," Have it your way. Wish you luck next time. God bless you!"

So.....have it your way, anyone! You know where you could find me. I'll just sit here and try to have some peace for myself.

Sunday, November 4, 2007

A Restless Weekend

This was supposed to be a relax weekend. Granted, there was a choir job for sunday wedding to attend. But, the songs were standard ones, even though the choir wouldn't be on 100% full is a month full of wedding invitations for some members.
Nevertheless, I couldn't rest well this weekend. Nothing interesting on the TV all weekend, and more sadly.....none of my friends were online! So, I chose to obey my body demands to take an early night rest. Alas, bad dreams in the night since friday had made me awake early in the morning, when I always rise quite late on saturdays and sundays. So, it felt like I had to wake up, instead had enough of sleep.
Now, it's sunday night, and still a lonely night.
Where is everybody????

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Someone's success story

Today, I've found out that one of my first online dates have just married. Wow, congratulation! Maybe I should ask if his bride was one of his numerous online dates.

We met over than 4 years, actually he who contacted me first, said had my number from my ICQ profile. I never know his looks, since I never found his profile and even more never met him in reality although he asked me several times to meet him. Time was always against us, plus many doubts nagged my conscience in agreeing to his invitations. Then...puffff.....he's gone with the wind, until in this year I accidentally found his profile in another website. But everything had changed then, added to a new information I found about him that's so different from what he told me years that's why my alarm always went off whenever he was around.

Anyway, he's married now....uff, I should send him a congratulation card!! Wish him a happily ever after. Hope his bride success in making him an more honest!!

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Missing someone

It takes a minute to have a crush on someone,
an hour to like someone,
and a day to love someone............
But, it takes a lifetime to forget someone

dedicated for someone I knew a little more than 3 years ago, and had lost contact with for 3 years now
you have made it hard to be compared, yet


It is so hard to find an honest, true, sincere friend nowadays.
Couldn't find many friends through work.
Couldn't make friends outside work, because there is so few time to socialize
Building relationship through internet...or one call it the only alternative
But how much hurt it has made me