Thursday, August 23, 2012

1000 days after Dad's Passaway

 
My dad had passed away on November 27, 2009.....a thousand days ago... on age 74 years after been ill for so long and spent most of the last year of his life in and out of hospital.
 
Sadly, I barely have any sweet memories with him. Why? Because we didn't spent too many times as family while he still alived and we're still young children. He was a Navy officer, and spent most of his active duties on the seas. When he had retired, we were already teenagers and young adults with our own busy daily activities and ring of friends. I, for instance, didn't know how to stay long and keep talking with him about our days. Most of times, I just said hi, good morning and I have to go [somewhere].
 
Even when the other siblings of mine had gotten out from home - because of marriage or work out of town - made me the only child still lived with my parents, I couldn't get any closer to him. I simply couldn't find any common grounds to easily talk with him.
 
Once, before his passaway, while I was stopping by at the hospital to give something Mom needed, out of the blue he invited me to sit beside him for a while. I refused him, firstly because my time was very limited, I had to depart to my work ASAP. Secondly, because I was scared he would talk the way people near death talking....asking for something I wasn't ready to answer, requesting for something I wasn't sure to be able to do. Have I regretted for refusing his final request? Hmmm....no, I don't think so....I'm just curious about what things he wanted to say to me....but it really doesn't matter to me....:)
 
On August 21, 2012 evening, we gave a special mass for him. It's part of Javanese tradition. These last three years, we had carefully planned our activities in accordance with the remembrance days for Dad's passaway. Seven days after his passaway, 100 days after, a year after, two years after. This year is the final ritual. After the mass and after cleaned the house and put everything back to its original place, Mom said to us - her children - : "It is all done. From now on, it's time to step forward and make a new living."
 
And so it is.... Mom and I start to concentrate in building our new baby business - it's a laundry business. It is not as though we will forget Dad, because there's still Mom that I think will always reminds me of him. After all, how else am I here, breathing and living, without  Dad? hehehe...
 
So, Dad, I hope you are listening up there. Rest in peace, Dad. Don't worry, we're okay here, and will try to keep on okay....:)... Sail on, Dad.....
 

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